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Yesterday was an interesting day

September 23rd, 2006 at 02:13 pm

I finally went ahead and transferred $2,393.61 from my Bank of America savings account to my checking account. I left the minimum $1500 in savings to keep my checking free.

And from there, I transferred $1,393.61 to my ING account.

I held $1000 back because my co-workers were registering for a course that our PI was supposed to pay for, but they couldn't find him in time. So who's Ms. MoneyBags in case they had to throw down a check anyway?

Yours truly, apparently. Blink

That is just wrong on so many different levels.

Thank goodness I didn't actually have to loan them the money. Actually, I would have been loaning my boss money. How weird is that? And it's not a trivial amount, too.

Anyway, after work, I attended an International Student Welcome Dinner with two labmates. I would be getting a free meal, and all I had to do was...pretend to be an international student. It was amusing and rather stressful, because although I knew I looked the part, I also knew that if I spoke one lick of English, my perfect American accent would give me away instantaneously.

So I did a lot of smiling, nodding, enthusiastic gesticulating, and fakely-accented single syllabic responses. Anything to convince people that I wanted to communicate, I was trying to, but I couldn't speak enough English to carry on a full conversation.

Yeah, it was pretty hilarious. Smile

The food was good, though, and totally worth it--eggplant parmesian, salad, and pizza. And I got to take home a free box of donuts because they had too much left over. Score!

Then, I went to B&N to read. I finished half of Rich Dad Poor Dad. Fascinating book, I'll need more time to absorb it.

On the way home, I passed by a help wanted sign. Didn't have the guts to go in and ask about it, though. Why am I such a wuss?? I guess I just hate confronting people (this is why I retreat to the internet). I just freeze up and end up talking myself out of it.

Maybe next weekend, when the SO visits, I'll have him accompany me as I go door-to-door. That might, like, actually force me to go inside and ask.

I'm also thinking of getting certified as an EMT, and then doing that as my part-time nights and weekends job. All this, because I'm afraid to walk into a store and ask about their help wanted sign.

Self-confidence? What self-confidence?

3 Responses to “Yesterday was an interesting day”

  1. yummy64 Says:

    My Mom and Aunt pulled something like that once. My mom was driving and speeding and got pulled over by the cop. As she's from Germany she did the best can't speak english routine. My aunt, with her pure English accent, sitting in the passanger seat beside her spent the entire time biting her tongue and making sure she didn't let the cat out of the bag. They pulled it off too. No ticket Smile

    Congrats on your free meal Smile

  2. JanH Says:

    My daughter was treated for social anxiety disorder and she is getting out there a whole lot more. She had so much trouble talking to people and facing strangers. Her self-confidence has grown in lots of little steps. Perhaps you are blaming yourself when it is something else. Worth thinking about.

  3. amberfocus Says:

    yummy64: Great story!

    JanH: I've always known that I'm highly introverted, and I know I get social anxiety, but I never thought I might have it to the extent where it becomes a pathological disorder.

    I generally do all right in situations where I *have* to confront someone, but I'm invariably less articulate than I am when it's in my head, in writing, or with friends. Very frustrating.

    When facing something that's possibly voluntary, like in the aforementioned situation... I flee. Urg.


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